After

I am not trying to maximize this quake, but if you live on the East Coast, this stuff does not figure into our life here. I heard Cali's were mocking us...obviously length and girth of the quake. I have been through some big ass shimmers in Los Angeles.
Okay, I need to tell you this.
I walked a mile or so when my bus refused to move. i walked to the train station. I went down the stairs and some Asian guy was sitting there in his chef whites. I was like, "oh my God how are you doing after this shake up". And he said, quote, "You have fat belly. You are fat man"
Who, in creation talks to a stranger like this? Why, was I the one?
In college some girl I loved, was talking about me. She said I had tits.
I lost like 55 pounds and was skeletal. This fucking chinese dude screwed me up.

Crucial Blunders

Sometimes i wake up and I'm just smelling my pillow, trying to be Zen and it hits me.
My roof in St.Thomas was such. Southern exposure (the street where we hitched)...from my room, about 12 feet drop. Collorbone, bruised hip. East...3 feet...bruised ego. West is funny because I do not think I have ever been on that side of the hpuse.
North keeps me up at night.
Jay (my roomate) would go up in the early morn. to check the surf.
We had steps up and then some gate/ladder we had to swing over and walk parallell to the sun and reach the top.
I had a roof party one Monday. I brought up my stereo system (turntables in those days) and a big rug for dancing.
It was me, Marni, Sherrie and Jay. I dee jayed.
Afterwards me and Jay sat on the North side of the apt and blew a joint. I looked down and I have had thos fear of heights since, It was like an 180 foot drop/ My screams inside were audible. man. I think of this to this day and still sqirm/

Another one for the 27 Club

Amy Winehouse now shares the list of musicians who are in the 27 Club. Those who died at, you guessed it, 27. Robert Johnson, Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain...

Rabbit Hole

Personally, I love reading. I also dig when I read something from a book will be adapted or was optioned to be a film. There are us snobs who will always say,"The book was better". Isn't that obvious.
I missed "Rabbit Hole" when it was in the theaters for that one week. Nicole Kidman got some kudu's for it. The rental (DVD) at the library looks to be about 3 weeks, so I requested the written source.
New Knowledge.
Pulitzer Prize Winner (07): Best Play
Big Tony Award winner.

Reading a play takes no more than 4 hours and your life is so enriched.
Please o to your library and ask for this.

Also...Do not read the last 6 pages in public, because you will lose it.

DearGod...

...So, in our elder years, your giving me these moles WTF

Calling Every Waiter or Waitress

Please,Please...watch Party Down. It is one of those those that a) Got cancelled too early and b) neverhad a shot because it was on Starz.

Not since "The Comeback" has anything been so brilliant.

I can not even get into the cast. Perfection. Take my word.

Branded

Have you heard? Everyone in L.A. is a whore? Well, I listened to this live comic podcast and this person actually branded themselves. I had zero idea what the fuck BRANDED means, but it seems like all the whore's are taking advantage.

I have never been so grossed out in my life.

I fucking hate Los Angeles.

"I'm branded with ciroc vodka".

It seems every no talent ass-hole want's to brand themselves to a company.

Hold myponytail, I am gonna puke.

Podcasts

I have had zero to do with my songs on Itunes lately. I have made every mix I can possibly do.
I have totallybeen into podcasts lately. Something, over a year ago I asked my friend Jen to start with me. So here are my favorite podcasts (all free) for you to stream at your boring job or download while your on the elipticle.

Pop culure happy hour NPR

Sklarsboro County if your into insane sport stories

Comedy Bang Bang inane and insane comedy

Extra Hot Great for Canadians living in NYC's view on culture

The Apple Sisters A comedy troupe from the 40's (read:now211)

I will continue.

AM I Switching Teams..Fuck man

Staten Island makes me so fucking horny. I am now in love with this dynamo girl named _____.
I absolutely dig her. Her eyes are grey,jett black hair. She is so aweome.

Ted

I started this job (waitering) and the GM's name is Ted. I had Tom on the brain, so I was corrected. Did not last long. Nor my memory.
I came back the next day to train, and as I shook his hand, I said, "Hey Tom". The thing is, I did not realize it until I was at the bus stop 9 hours later.
The Kicker
I came home and was reading this story (on line), and the last sentence, I swear to God, said..."I'm Ted, not Tom".

Are We Not...

Shouldn't we have jetpacks by now? Man up. My feet are killing me.

The Girl Who Kicked The Hornets Nest

I just finished the last of the three Swedish movies of "The Girl w/the Dragon Tattoo" series. I've read the books and I really think the movie adaptations are excellent. If you are looking forward to seeing the American version directed by David Fincher, I would go down to the library and take out the Swedish versions first.

Also,if you caught any of the Swede one's and thought the actress who plays Lisbeth Salander looked bad ass, check out this Charlie Rose clip of her from 6 months ago. ( about a 1/3 of the way down the page is the interview).

"I can't get to sleep..."

I need all suggestions on how to fall asleep. The pharmacist told me to try benedril. Nope. I bought excedrin PM. Nope. Herb--> starts with a v and I had to make a tea with it. Zoinks.

Gym 2 hours. Nada.

Television, my best male friend

**Men Of A Certain Age

**Nurse Jackie

**United States of Tara


Need suggestions

If my last name was Weiner...

First off, and not being insensitive to Jewish last names, I would promote not having some name from the old country which when translated here gets you mocked. Ralph Lauren changed his name from Ralph Lipshitz. Would you buy clothes from Ralph Lipshitz?
So, trusty and fiesty Anthony Weiner want's to go to Congress and become Mayor or Governor someday of the state of New York.
Dude, change your name.
About 12 years ago, I can see him fighting with his mother and father. They won over a tray of Linzer tarts.
So,in the light of yet another scandal from (3 posts down he was not in it ) these cocky, brazen, drunk Congressmen and Senators (and Presidents), can we please fill majority with women?
If my last name was Weiner, the last thing I WOULD EVER do, is send cock shots via Twitter.
The puns don't write themselves.
NY Post is having a field day with the euphemisms.
The thing that grosses me out the most...he shaves/waxes his chest.

If your Girlfriend is a starred *commenter on Jezebel

GET THE FUCK MOVING!!

Is there a term for the abuse an adult child takes (gets)?

My friend has to be there. Ya, know? They are the only one around. The surgeries have been rough and still on going, and he/she is the dartboard. They can not take it anymore. They need to know if there is a word for the verbal and some times physical abuse that a mother takes out on her adult son/daughter.

Dreams: Open Doors

I never remember anything about my dreams, but two specific instances stand out. Open Doors in both dreams. I just read the meaning about this occurrence and it signifies new beginnings. I think I have hit the Jerri Blank stage of my life.

Costanza/Can't Stand Ja

douche

Do you think the NYT reads the Cool Store

an article in the NYT recently focused on....drumroll...Movies I say I have seen but did not.
Do you think they read me? Christ on a Cracker (my new favorite saying). Well I have had so many idea's stolen from me, I guess the Times is a plus.
But now, whenever I do this column,folks are gonna be like? "Was that it the Times"
I did it first,thanks.