Thursday, August 30, 2007

Ding...Ding...ROUND THREE

Well, she's definately ovulating this time. The kit says so. So we did the method commonly referred to as the turkey baster method this morning. This sometimes ensures it will be a girl. I went running/jogging/walking/crawling afterwards so I can get my endorphins pumping for part two this afternoon.
Sloan has the greatest girls name picked out.
Mikaha pronounced Mick-kye-ya
And whats cool about this name is that it incorporates the Mickey part...
This was not intentional.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

The 3rd time is the charm

I'm headed down to Florida again next week for the monthly offering.
Gosh...Miss Sloan wants a bambino so bad. She is already registered to the fact that it won't happen. Cripes. She's 34! How many drunk ass 34 year olds are going to go out tonight, have a few Cosmo's (or Mojito's) , get laid and find out they are preggers in a month!!!!
Dam it!!

I was going to make this a lot longer, but this suit and tie guy next to me is using everything in his power to itch every centimeter of his body, and I think he has crabs and I do not wan't to get them. Yeah, they jump.
Love and kisses,


I've been waiting for this movie via the library waiting list for a bit. Like a month. Yesterday it arrived with Jarmusch's "Coffee and Cigerettes". The movie is "Mysterious Skin" by Greg Araki and starring that kid from "3rd rock from the sun." This movie creeped me out big time within the first 17 minutes. I have to keep on watching. Kinda like a disaster.
It's not your usuall kid gets raped by Pedophile fare, where it is creepy but watchable. This one really sets the mood correctly. Meaning, Creep-orama

Monday, August 20, 2007

Rail Roaded

I heard a train in the distance @ 11:30 pm this past Sunday. The subways are few and far between as it is already on the weekends, forget about the fact that I would have to wait about another 40 minutes and then miss two ferries in the interim. So, I had prepared myself with my money and my metro card which kookily enough had 45 cents on it. A Metrocard is a plastic card which serves in place of tokens these days in New York City. It also gives you the liberty of swiping it after a subway ride for a transfer on another MTA mode of transport. I had the exact change for the remainder of my card, $1.55, and the train in the distance. I inserted my card in, hit refill, hit $2.00 cash, inserted the cash and change...train getting closer...Heart pounding...Transaction completed, no receipt thank you. I swipe my card and it says "Insufficient Funds" or something we never like to see. I did not get a receipt. Train getting closer. I see the MTA lady in the booth talking to some tourist and explaining so nastily the trains to take. I'm next. She actually made believe I was invisible and went back to her circle a word game. Train about to pull in any second.
"Miss, I just put two dollars in the machine..."
"Use the gate" she barks as she points to the entry for people with suitcases and strollers.
"No, but, I need the transfer"
"Use The Gate" she points harder to the crusted black peeling jail bars.
"I know where the gate is, I need the transfer for when I get off the ferry"
Just then the train was pulling in.
"Do you wanna miss your train or what" she stated in such a way as if she was asking me if I wanted the curtain or the box, and one of them has a booby prize.
I took the curtain, I mean the train. I stressed the whole way over on the ferry because I did not have my ATM card and I did not feel like getting arrested for jumping the turnstiles. Stress...Creating Lies in my head...all because I paid the money and got nothing in return. I ended up getting off the ferry and asking the train conductor in Staten Island if he could give me a break, and before I could get the rest of my contrived 'story' out he waved me through. I thanked him profusely and headed home.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007


There is a scene in "Saved" a cool movie wherein these two teenager lovers were underwater and having a conversation. He says" I'm blurb bubble bubble gay" and it's really funny. I used to do the same thing with my brothers in our pool. I was thinking of this last night when I took a 1 am dip in the pool @ my condo. We also used to have tea parties underwater.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Sad Reputation

I was watching Saturday Night Live last week and the musical guest was Avril Levine (Canadian) and I swear to you, after singing this first song about '...being your girlfriend..' or some such nonsense, I thought I would fling the remote and I felt as though my ears were bleeding. But, then her 2nd ditty came on and it was absolutely the worst song I have heard in ages. I really felt sorry for her band mates, or whoever is feigning interest in her music for the sake of scoring some money on her tour. These guys looked kind of cool, but the overacting to her abysmal singing and non sensical lyrics that were so freaking contrived made me think that after this tour they should be plagued with either one of those ditties sticking in their heads' for like a year.

Friday, August 03, 2007

Judge and Jury and Judy

I've been laid up the last couple of days and I guess I've tested the 5 channels of televisions daytime options. There seems to be a lot of new Judge shows on. I like this one named "Judge Maria Lopez" and this other guy "Judge Alex". <--- that last one sounds so funny, kind of like 'Eric the Clown' on Seinfeld. Anyway, I've noticed that a lot of the plaintiffs and defendants have one, two or most of the following characteristics that do not necessarily affect their cases.

  • Substance Abuser they looked toasted on screen often
  • Trans Gendered or Trans Sexual a lot of times someones witness is this
  • Mid Western (natch)
  • Gay male who is married
  • Fat...actually really fat and dressing a little too skimpy (reminder:the camera adds 10 lbs)
  • All Dog fights involve pit bulls
  • Look WAY older than it states they are
  • None of the boyfriends of either suers/sued ever works

Please add your own.