Thursday, December 23, 2010

Best TV of 2010

God knos I watch too much TV. But half of to 2/3rds of it I watch online through illegal means (China tv et al).

  • Mad Men : the best tv has to offer
  • Breaking Bad: Can not imagine this show lasting another season due to it's storyline
  • Nurse Jackie: she got busted. Edie (one of my fav. names) is in hot saline
  • Modern Family: So much to love
  • The Big C: Laura Linney:enough
  • Weeds: Best ending for the last to ending season
  • Boardwalk Empire: Michael Pitt, Michael Shannon...have I said too much?
  • United States of Tara: new identity/still has Toni Collette
  • ProjectRunway: Mondo and Andy were my first episode favs.

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Spiderman-The Musical

I don't know if this has translated across the States or the pond or the oceans but this deal is a collosal flop, and I smile. Let me fill you in. Second coming of Christ in his own sunglassed blindness is Bono and the ugly guy who got dumped by Naomi Campbell, the Edge produced this 65 Million dollar flop-tastic joke. Julie Taymor, director of many acclaimed plays and flops was to inflict her horrors onto millions of unsuspecting tourists. It was concieved for the stage over a year ago, with rehersals and all. It came to fruition about 3 weeks ago with previews (meaning, reviewers can not base their essay on these preformances). Lucky reviewers. Who lost 2 teeth by a flying cable,which audience member almost got shanked, it's a comedy of errors.
Backstory: they took this classic theater and rubbled it to make it more doable.
They have this grandiousity that is previously seen in Pol Pot and Hitler.
Monday night,one of the Spidermen plunged 200 feet to a near death.
Anyone wanting to see this show is the same rubbernecking idiot who wants to see a mangled body in thecar that caused a 45 minute backup on the 5.
As a side note. I saw U2 in 81' when they played Cornell and I was in love with them. This dissapated soon after when Mr. Frontman proclaimed himself the second coming. Kind of after "One" came out.

Monday, December 13, 2010

What!! What is wrong man

Dexter is divorcing his tv sister....What is wrong with you straighties? Serious! 2 years? I do not tongue kiss in this time!!!This distresses me.

Scary Movie

I just talked to C----from Fla.
She happened into this Community Workshop for like a strength (personal/no physical) session. 15 clams. She happened to have entered the Twilight Zone 2010.
It was if the Mentalist from CBS joined forces with some retired Floridian. He picked her out cause he said anyone know anyone with a "B" that's dead? Serious...He picked her out and after he spoke about her aunt taking care of her he mentioned a dead female. She was oblivious,though... her 15bucks was well spent when she remembered he was talking about Kerry.
She perked. They were together that day. I asked her (Kerry) half-heartily to come to St. Martin with me, I did not want her to say yes, but I asked. It was my B-day and I was gonna surprise myself with the fact that I was gonna be me. P.S. Nothing happened I flew into the St.Thom airstrip (!) after I was greeted with rum punch,I called Jay.
This was..up till now the worst phone call in my life.
Me: Hey man,I am at the airport, I will be between the Rum Punch guy and the patois wagon.
Jaybird:Michael...I have some bad news

Have you ever scene a grown man bawl by himself in an airport/pseudo port? I have never lived this down my friends. I absolutely loved this woman and her sis and her nephew and yet, she died so savagely.
This dude told C---- that she had a great day(prior),that she (for what it is worth) died instantly. She made a bad turn (how the fuck did he know this) and she is Watching over a guy she really cared for named Michael, Mitchell?
I need to express one or two things. I have a zero religious denominations (?) embodying me. I still pray. I believe in God, but not the God that is zealotry or conforming.
I have known about 6 people in my life who have died, but my fondness goes to my Grandma and Kerry. For which I can say, every time I pray, I ask them to hear me.
I have not been so frigging touched in so long to hear that this gorgeous woman I was so foolishly having sex with because I was so ashamed of my self is watching. Cripes, what an eye full she has had.
I needed to write this because I have felt guilty for over 20 years.
I just need to tell this Pshyc dude, you really helped me. I think you took away the drink from me, and I swear I am crying like a newborn. Please my dear Kerry, hold my hand.

I love writing like this...I hope you likey. Much Love, Mick

Tuesday, December 07, 2010

Island of Misfit Toys Pt. II

Ya know...when I moved to St.Thomas, I found a bunch of people who did a similar move, (Me: I went for a wedding and never went back). I absolutely loved these people, yet, I scrawled, on our graffiti strewn apartment(our own Harring existence) that this WAS the island of Misfit toys. This was not a dis.

I feel like this is the existence wherein I want to live.

Maybe it is pressures of trying to find a job, or like (gulp) trying to find a lover and stuff, but I find (I sense it) myself getting very ornery. I'm a grouch/sceptical for most parts of my day. I see zero acts of kindness while I have headphones on listening to bands who promote loveliness. The days of the "ole cat ran up a tree and the firemen came out" scenario is so gone. Nice makes page 8, under the fold.

I left St.Thomas because crack became an epidemic there and I sensed it. I actually went with this guy called Tan to buy it (cue Elvis), in the ghetto.

And in 2 months I lost my job, my sanity, my pseudo girlfriend and I felt myself slipping into hell. A hell which I still have a mailbox at.

I never told anyone about my extra-curricular activities. I was just, not present sometimes.

What I need to say is, that, obviously every place has it's Crack-town these days, I still feel I would have bettered myself to stay. The Internet and all that shit was not around. Cripes...did I even have a Walkman? Ya see? Sweet dreams...

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Pick Your Face and Vaccum Your Carpet 24/7

When I lived in West Hollywood, I lived below this MethHead.See, even though I knew this chemical to be crank in the mid-80's in Atlantic City where I worked, it kind of nose dived as a drug(at leat in my circles) until I moved to WeHo (!) in the late nineties.

It was ramapant among every single person in Hollywood but still eluded me...<---My first thoughts, in the 80's was of snorting Drano/Fantastic/A&H Baking Soda. My circles were so small in Los Angeles that I could not believe it when I heard that all of a society was gak-ing.

I may have told you before that I was the later attendant of Chastity (now Chaz) Bono's apartment. I told you lesbians are cheap....this place was 570 when I rented it and a studio. She may have moved out because who knew that the guy living directly above me in the same architectually (sp) designed apartment was a Meth head. Prominent among gays in these days he would either be vacuuming his 200 sq foot apartment for 15 hours of the day or else he would be dropping what sounded to be a bowling ball (12 lb.) every 15 seconds. And people wonder why I drank?

I never thought a T.V. show about Meth would pique my interest. I need to state that "Breaking Bad" is among this fellow T.V. Heads favorite shows, ever. Top 5...Bar none. I rented seasons 1 & 2 from the library and I started watching 2 days ago, and I feel like (hah) I could use a little of the witches Comet to follow through watching every episode. It is wonderful. Now where is my Electralux?

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Gerri Blank meet Mickeyitaliano

Today I read that Staten Island has the most , per capita scrips for Oxycontin/done. Some old fuck doctor got arrested for writing these, and all I can say is: "Uh Huh". My ennui continues. There is no place to call home these days, like the bucolic neighborhoods Tim Burton created for "Edward Scissorhands." I just wanna go home, but I do not want any familiar faces there. <--great line for a song

Sunday, November 14, 2010


Ah Ming!!...He has been one of my favorite Chefs for about 15 years or so since he began his PBS show ("East Meets West"). He made it all the way to the finals for "The Next Iron Chef" and he was eliminated last night. I picked him and the female Chef who also got 86'd last night from the first show of 15 competing Chefs. He is a cool guy and I hope he gets another chance. You have had to have beaten an Iron Chef on a previous show of that season to be on this. I think Ming beat Battalli (yeah!). Anyway, I hope I did not scare any of you who are fans of his to think that he was goners in that other way.


When I lived in Los Angeles, car city,I had this really amazing Ford Escort Station Wagon that I painted Hunter Green. It was great for lugging all the stuff from work, great for the dogs, just great. I was first on line at a red light on Robertson Blvd and Melrose when the light changed to green I gassed it and as I look to my left I see a Datsun or something coming at me at like 45 mph. I threw myself into the passenger seat as she barrelled into me. My Escort totalled, I needed a newish car. My friends' mechanic had this ugly blue Bonneville wherein the owners dropped it off to get fixed and never returned. I bought it, painted it a steel grey and never romanticised the memory of the Escort again.

This car (Bonny) was made for 5pm Early Birders in FL and AZ. It had every freaking contraption in the world. Sunroof, seat warmers, remember the seat position on both side suede bucket seats, A/C for Sneezley and Breezley, and a radio/cd/cassette player that was like as insane as the amount of speakers. I loved this damn car and now I hear the whole Pontiac brand is history. Oh, I forgot the whole main groovey thing ...guys would constantly ask me about my car (steel grey was just coming into fashion as a car color), I mean people who were driving freaking Beemers and Audi's. Weird, huh? Well,sleep well dear Pontiac company. (I'm sure the Trans Am Guido's are freaking out!!

Friday, November 05, 2010


I have to be the only guy who has 6-7 great friends who never watch TV or would not be pumped for doing the"Amazing Race". Granted. J____ can not leave her situation now, forget D___ and C___,they have zero interest.

I am in busters...It would be so cool, because we can say we were this type of friends (aloof?).

A Million bucks,y know

Josie and her 4 Pussycats

On Monday my Mom celebrated her 40th year in the Supreme Court. She's behind bars...ha
They had a celebration for Jo and all her compadriats who had taken 'the buyout'. They started announccing all the retiree's names (28 in all). Everything was going col and smooth when they were at McGuilicuty and then there was friction at the booth. Well, the MC (who is a Judge) said, well I'm gonna have "Doris" say something, and then my Mom's judge went up and the ovations were overwhelming. Remember those audience meters on the Gong Show? Well, she broke em. Everyone in the place was snapping pictures of her and her Judge, Mr. M___. The 10 of us at the table lost it. I felt so proud of this woman,my MOM, who put 4 kids through high school and college and aside from a few misderminors (me) we are decent guys. We had 11 at the table. I can not get down from this high, because that is my mom. (that is Mom,overwhelmed with her Judge).

I Don't Know You, But I Think I Would Dislike You...immensely

I rmember an episode of Will and Grace...they played this game of going through the 'Us' weekly and they would say if they liked or hated that person.

Will: "Well,here you go, Jada Pinkett."

Grace: Hate her

I plotzed!

2 of My Things Came to Light

***The UK has started slow and fast lanes on some streets

***The UK (again...I know) show "Shameless" which i wrote about is now a new series on Showtime

Some mutha effer is reading this blog and taking all my ideas!!!

Friday, October 29, 2010

I Don't Know You, But I Think I Would Dislike You...immensely

This is a new section in which I deign to never want to be in the company of, working for or waiting on...said person. I basing this solely on introspective internal devices (kind of like Gaydar). I need to say that the whole Will Smith family have their own category.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

I get Lost...

I just do not know what the frig is wrong with me.
Everytime I am suppossed to meet someone I get all nervous. This time I had expired pills and a bottle of Marsala wine. I can not handle the pressure. I am so afraid of the person I am, the percieved version seems so much more attractive. I can not live up to my personality. Maybe I always sem to make things seem so clear, standard, yet I have never admitted to this. So, the day comes and I have to meet you and I need to get schnockered in any way I can. I am so embarrassed of who I am, and all my failures and mis-steps and could have beens.
I had been straight for __ months and then I was confronted to meet my past and I was so shy and so scared, and I blew it. Again. If you read this later. I hope you know I am sorry.

Can't stay at home can't stay at school

I was just watching these video's of "The Runaways" member, Cherie Curie and she cracks me up. Okay toots, it's time for a new haircut....
I love her to death but seriously, are you gonna were that same haircut, the feathered 'Cherry Bomb' look for the rest of your life? Fun fact: Cherie is a skilled and prize winning "chain saw" architect.
It's like Scott Baio with the hair in the middle flowbie look...C'mon honey, you were a rocker.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Mad Man/Mad Men

I know I am not Don Draper in the looks...I kind of fancied me a Roger Sterling. I am a mess...season 3.
I wish I had this collectiveness.
I love Don...And I know alll these femenists hate him. Fuck You. He is the better dad I never had.
I so wante him to be with a cool woman for 2 seasons sans Betty. I hated all his choices. As much as the other secretaries and ad. min people hated Meagan, she is hot and talented, and she is a catch. I think the scene showing Joan telling her hubby in Vietnamsays it all....I effing love Don Draper.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

I had fun being fat, I think

I have not been fat since the days of 'husky' pants. I have recently been gaining weight and putting a donut on top. Funny thing is,I eat zero fast foods and I have not had a donut since 1982 when Carol worked at Dunkin. My weight is all accummulated booze. Hollow leg? I'm going to present myselfwith a steam-lodge.
I met this guyin Rehab who was 2 years older than me, but 8 years older than me there. I shaved some years...(I know..i am the worst). He had lost all the feeling in his r/l leg because of alchohol. The thing that amazed me most was that he was a skinny/Minny and I was this fat sloth (gavone).
His name was Danny, and he as a bartender. I do not have good feelings abouthis life but I am hopeful.....1 in ten y'all.

If I read a book do I get a star?

I just finished the biography of "The Replacements".
Kinda cool.
I learned a few things.
1) Never start a band with your friends
2) Never give someone too much
3) Always be humble

They were the greateast Rock band that never was. I saw them 8 times from 1989-their demise...
"I'm the boy they couldn't ignore".
I think of this girl Kerry so much.
She came to my place a coupla times ,
And she laughed when I played my tape.

I had two roomates when I was in the islands,
And I told both of them I was an insomniac and I needed music,
Niether flinched.

I played "Please to Meet Me" by the 'Mats at least 14 times a day. My cassette player would switch the tape over. When I just gotin contact with my great friend Jay (roomate), I sent him a video/song of" I.O.U." which opens the tape we listened to.

Focus Groups

Last year,I took a focus group for nothing less than Vodka. We never tasted it. It was about airportbars...For that one I got 175 forlike an hour. The taste test today was for the new Iphone....they had like 30 people....for some reason I was excluded. Psych!I still gotpaid 150 bucks. WTF!!!!!!!!So,as I was leaving (also in my group) said ,""Merry Christmas"...kinda weird some tattooeed bitch is saying this.
My mom is having her 40 year anniversary...repeat 40 years...I am making her a (hopefully) picture of us 4 boys from @ Penny'photo. (Oh,we were 1,3,5,6 at the time)...It's her favorite picture of us....Betty Draper (ha)......

The Best Movie you HAVE NEVER Seen

You have to believe on this's in English/well sort off...New Zealand Brougue

This film....ahhhh Simply 5 star amazing

Monday, October 18, 2010

New Movie's

Everything in this nepotistic world (not a good phrase) Of script making relies on 2 things (first) :Can it be in 3D..can we get that little go-getter Ashton Cyrus...The knife is sharp and next to my bed...

If you walked to Mars,that be cool....

If he was from Venus, would he feed us with a spoon?
If he was from Mars, wouldn't that be cool?
Standing right on campus, would he stamp us in a file?
Hangin' down in Memphis all the while.


Children by the million sing for Alex Chilton when he comes 'round
They sing "I'm in love. What's that song?
I'm in love with that song."

Cerebral rape and pillage in a village of his choice.
Invisible man who can sing in a visible voice.
Feeling like a hundred bucks, exchanging good lucks face to face.
Checkin' his stash by the trash at St. Mark's place.


I never travel far, without a little Big Star

Runnin' 'round the house, Mickey Mouse and the Tarot cards.
Falling asleep with a flop pop video on.
If he was from Venus, would he meet us on the moon?
If he died in Memphis, then that'd be cool, babe.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Mad Men

Just discovered this show..I saw like an episode or two,but I just watched season 1 while waiting for a phone call. At least one good thing came of my desperation. P.S. Joan Holloway is the goddess of all goddesses.

Saturday, October 09, 2010

Dear Music Industry

I really got over the change to CD's...I basiclly had zero options to clean my pot (ha! do they stillcall it that?) Okay, you fucked over Aimee Mann and other indie gods and goddesses. Tower Records went bust... What is next, man? Does anyone remember those miniscule CD looking things? ha...suckers.

Friday, October 08, 2010

Job Interview...321in a series

I've gotta be honest here...I very rarely get excited for an interview. I either know I am gonna get hired and leave within 13 days or I am a desperado and need it.
I got called back for this Sports Bar opening. This is my dream gig. I have about 75 appetizer recipes that I am juggling in my head...all, majorly great.
The big culinary thing this year seems to be meatballs (duh)...whatever...
When the Italiano kids were younger, my Mom would make the Sunday 'sauce'. This was/is a 'gravy' of tomatoes and stuff like hot/sweet sausages/bracciole/meatballs and other PIGins (ha).
Josie would fry the meat-a-balls and then throw (literally) themin the sauce. She always set out a fried meatball for each lose.
I want to make an appetizer of fried meatballs with a 'sauce' and also a sweedish meatbll sauce for dipping.
Okay, I just got hungry...gotta go

Flash Mob: S.I. Ferry Version

I'm guessing some of you guys live in a tourist haven. For the cheaper visitor's to NY, instead of taking the 7 buck trip to Ellis Island/Statue of Liberty, they pack their meandering laxidasical bodies onto the Staten island Ferry and get long shot photo's of said landmarks.
I'm thinking of a cool flash mob kinda thing.
As soon as the ferry doors open, about 500 people just rush in and stand near every possible window and view imaginable. Just to watch these Inge's and Rolff's trying to get a picture would be worth all the salt.
I have photo bombed like 12 pictures this week alone!!
Fucking tourists...they crack me up man.

Wednesday, October 06, 2010

What if?

Jeanine Garofalo berated me when i could not let Joan Osborne enter Largo. We were at capacity and how the frig did I know it was her? She was so tiny,I could put her in a little box. She was relly kind though...Hey,rules are rules. Wait till I tell the Larry David story. Crikey!

Monday, October 04, 2010


I was in my little as library the other- and I found this DVD of a Channel 4 (BBC) show called, "Shameless". Sort of a Brit Dramedy, and I picked it up. See, I love the fact that Brittish T.V. is so un-abashed...with curses,nudity and themes. I have scored 2 times before : "New Street Law" and the Simon Doonan bio "Fabulous". WTF, I thought. Ya see, British shows only go for a series of 7-10 episodes per year, so if you love em', yo are really yearning.
Is fricking hooked 1 episode in o it apropos?.
I have been valiantly trying to find the rest of the series on-line. Usually,Brit.sitcoms and stuff (exception: "Coronation Street") last for 3 seasons, max.
So far,the series is in it's 7th year (thanks IMDB). I have so much to watch. Can not wait....

Thursday, September 30, 2010

I swear this is going somewhere...

I once saw a stand up (Jeanine Garofalo) talk about the bus in the movie, "Speed" and how it basically had every stock character from Central Casting. (This must have been around the time of Hollywood's big diversity kick). She is like,"You have your angry black man, your snappy old lady, your immigrant Mexican maid, your Eskimo with his harpoon..."
The Staten Island Ferry holds about 4,000 people at it's busiest times. It runs every 30 minutes from Staten Island to the bottom (Wall Street area) of Manhattan. Also, it passes the Statue of Liberty, Ellis Island, The Verrezano Bridge...good views of the Brooklyn Bridge...and oh, it's free.
Because it leaves every 30 minutes, shuffling on and off should be the major logistics (besides crashing 2X in 3 years) of the Ferry people.
As the world,(yep, it is not only America) keeps getting fatter, it is also getting slower. I, on the one hand need to visit Jenny Craig, but I am still kind of light on my feet. Maybe it is the 30 years of working on my feet or maybe because I remember the days of people just moving in every direction at the speed of sound when I was a messenger as a kid in Manhattan. Remember those old movies where you see all these businessmen in hats getting off the train and just plowing ahead?
So, now I have this scenario of the 'Speed bus cast" with something akin to the term 'cockblocker'. You see, whenever I am trying to move, especially when it comes to entering the Ferry, (the doors just shut. You could be an inch away) I am CONSTANTLY getting 'cockblocked' by the Central Casting of extra's. Yesterday it all came together, in one perfect scene,that had me laughing. No exaggeration here. The casting sheet for the extra's would look like this:
  • Old man with hump carrying groceries (must have height differential in both legs)
  • Clueless German tourists walking 4 abreast
  • Woman with briefcase on fold up luggage wheelie thingy
  • Fat person (5 foot)
  • Fat person (6 foot)
  • Mother with 2 school kids who are doing everything but walking
  • Hasidic family with 6 kids all under 10 years. 1 double stroller, 1 regular
  • The shuffling elderly Chinese couple
  • Man with cane
  • Man with luggage
  • Woman with walker
  • The walking newspaper reader
  • The tourist who got separated from the group, turning back constantly
  • Pod of cell phone people (all loud talkers)
  • Homeless guy with cart
  • Apathetic group of teens
  • Eskimo with Harpoon
Can we please enact my idea (spoken about previously) wherein we have chalked out lanes. "Road Runner...Strollers and Families...Tourists...Sloths... " I would be very happy.

Monday, September 20, 2010

An M5 Ran Over Me

Can we officially get rid of the phrase where one throws one "under the bus"? Please? The other night on Project Runway they said this so often,I thought that fashion director of Marie Clare Magazine,Nina Garcia was going to explode like a pinata.
How can this phrase (used by my estranged brother to describe himself) be so popular? It's kind of stupid....Do they throw ones self under the lorry? Bus in Danish...El Autobus? staetoi icelandic? Let's give this one a is stupid, and itjust popped up in the lst 6 years, right? ugh

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Johnny Cash

I have 2 and a half weeks of songs in my "I" library. So many do not get played. Like the 8th song on an album (which is usually great), I made a play-list of every song with 0-1 listens.
The first song up was Johnny Cash singing "Silent Night" (yeah, the Christmas tune) and I just bawled.

I've been so kind of fragile lately. I STILL have all these abandonment/Father issues. Prick. And here is this man in Black singing this gorgeous song and still in keeping with his machismo...
I hate thinking man

Facebook part II

Christine McC------d...I will never forget her C--- Sac---.
These beautiful women and I experienced a time together. We all lived in St. Thomas in the late 80's. C--- just crept up on us, and was the coolest woman, and I just kind of am misty eyed thinking of our friendship then. I want that now. I have Joyce/Sloan, Donna, Carol, Char... and everyone is 400 miles or more from me. Restraining orders? Ha! No. I miss my friends. I need to be close. Glad to have re-connected to Chriss. Thanks FB...find me DannyEdwards...

Bad Judgement

Last night I watched this film called "London to Brighton".
First off, I have been to England (albeit South Hampton), but I found it grey, and exspensive, and gray and dreary.
But,every film I see representing Brighton, makes me want to go there. It is like Seaside Heights with a passport.
Back to the subject.
This movie was FUCKING riveting. I could NOT look away for one second. (If you rent it, put the subtitles on, ya nob ya).
So, movie finished...Deep breathe...kinda heavy.!
I go to my site wherein they have movie reviews from every circulating media.
1 star out of 5. 1.5 out out of five. thumb down. 17 tomatoes....
I need to re-read my screenplay.

Weird Day

On the train this morning I saw this guy get on, decent suit, gay face. He was carrying a razor scooter and he as panting(like he just made the train).
On the subway, I saw two kind of distinguished looking guys talking. Yet they were not talking. They each had an Ipod earphone on and they were lip sychning raps. (Ha)
I have a big mouth...Some asshole ran the yellow/solid red light while I was crossing the street. His drivers window was right by my face as he ran the red light, and I said , "You are a fucking douche bag" and he got like 20 feet down the block and made a quick u-turn.
I do not run.
I ran.

Affirmitive Action in our Presidency...which way

The other day Hillary Clinton compared Mexico to Columbia 20 years ago, based on the increased (!!) surge of drug lords vs.the Mexican Govt. (A whole city of Mexico's government was 86'd because they were all working with drug lords). Obama dismissed this statement by Hillary the next day. (She is FUMING!) Today 48 drug lord workers were assisted in escaping a prison on the border of Houston, Tex by the prison guards working for the cartel.
I believe, our first Mrs. President to be was correct again.

Monday, August 30, 2010



Beautiful People

This is a positive guys. In a world of Negatives...This rates. It's a sho about this inda infamous New Yorker who dresses the "Barney's" windows.
This is one of the greatest TV shows ever. I have a link, but you can watch all12 episodes at LOGOtv. make me smile.


I only got to watch an hour or so because the other person I live with decided to have a shit fit, because this is one of the only thing I have watched on TV an this person has turned evil. Do you know what agita is? It is Italian for an upset stomach. Say your 35 plus and you ate a bowl of cavattelli with a pomodoro sauce and then you drank a big glass off milk. That is agita (1 fold). I am s hated in my family it is hysterical. I tried to watch one show and she chased me out with her squaking and hatred of herself, so,obviously, I am the scapegoat, and I stay up all night, intermittently crying.

Monday, August 23, 2010

These Days

This song is my life. I loved this guy since I was like 12, because of my older brother. I never asked Peter if the words were true to him.
I'm lonely tonight and I am thinking of Jax.

Don't confront me with my failures...I have not forgotten them


Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Mission Statement

I have to be one of the most fucked up guys alive. I,like hate work...avoid it at all costs,I wanna hit the lottery,but i still am not lazy. My feet are fucking killing me...i swear. I have callouses the size of Minneapolis. I'm kind of tired,or as my French Canadian lover used to put it...tie-red (yeah,it was cute but got tie-red real quick). I am like,black-listed. i swear to you,like 11 years ago,people would be like,"So can you grab a white shirt and start tonight?" And I was like, Ricochet Rabbit. My prospects in all fronts are dried up. I'm old,ugly,fat and retarded.

True Blood

Seriously rocked this week. Episode 309

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Vladimir Putin is my father

Oh,man...don't you love this guy. The former president of Russia who now goes by something like supreme leader. As a short man myself,I never knew how much power i can wield. Given his predecessors, including the J.O. father, they all belong in the same fiery hell.

Did you know that during the fiery furnace that has been Russia these days, Putin flew over and extinguished 2 fires?

Have you ever seen this fidget with his shirt off? he thinks he is Danial Craig as Bond. Oh, man, how many delusional fucks get to the top of the heap, while we urchins toil away.

Monday, August 09, 2010

It comes in Waves

I totally understand this phrase, especially after living beside water for my whole life and working on a ship. But, say you are sitting at the shoreline, and just letting the incoming surf tickle your toes. You can bet your next clamato juice on the fact that another wave is coming in. It's life, you know and I really like things that are constant. What I hate or can't stand is dis-order. And my life is so freaking full of every contrasting emotion (or emoticon for you neer do wells). I live with Love/Hate, Pride/Self Doubt, Lust/Derission, Wonderment/Disallusionment every half hour.
I am not as fucked up as you may think. I think. I read real books. I admire wordsmiths and I also realize that I will never, ever find love. It comes in tsunami's. Litlle trickle happen and then the big one hits.


CHEF WANTED: Largest Foodservice company in New York seeks Chef to prepare meals on pretigious College Campus in the Riverdale section of the Bronx. Includes student cafe, retail outlet, and special events catering. Chef must be passionate about preparring healthy, fresh menu items in a fast paced, professional environment. Serious applicants only! Full Time 40hours per week. Background checks and drug testing for all applicants mandatory. Must have culinary degree and at least 5 years industry experience. BENEFITS: Health, Dental, Vision, 401K, Sick, Vacation, Personal.
Compensation: Hourly Rate = $9.95 - $11.70 per hour

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

The TakeAway

I absolutely hate this NPR show. I hate the stupid freaking name, I can not stand Hockenbury and the 19 chicks (all black) that have been 86'd. Sometimes I hate NPR.

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Turn South for this Post

Or is it East? How do you feel about a Mosque being built near the former site of the Twin Towers? Go on, I'm listening.

old spice guy

I do not get it? LL Cool Jay is crying somewhere.

You don't wanna know me

I have to be the most unlucky mother fucker in the world or this was just destined to be. I am so sad. So fucking sad,you can not relate.
The job, the given...Me and this un-qualified guy. She was kissing him.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

I want all my lady friends to send me a pix of them on that 'special' day. This is Donna. I met her on Sept 08, 1981 and we have been friends since. This picture makes me crack up, and I smile very infrequently these days.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010


Thank You !!! I am never Fucking this up!! I will be here till I am 50! (Fifty Years Old, Dammit!) And then I will open my own place. I have tons of back catalogued presents to get people!! Be patient.

Jenna Maroney- Season 1 Factoids

Easily my favorite charactor on "30 RocK", Jenna Maroney has a scroll of accomplishments. This is how she has enough to pay for her Condo in Clearwater, Fl.
From Season One
* Played a female rapist on "Law & Order"
* Did an interview with Amtrak Magazine (the conductor was the interviewer)
* Had the #4 song on the Israeli charts with "Muffin Tops"
* Was engaged to David Blaine
* Was hot for and sent a letter to Scott Peterson in jail when he went blonde.
* Starred in "The Rural Juror" with Casey Affleck. Written by Kevin Grishom.
* Fired from her Shop Rite commercials.
* Told Life & Style Magazine her favorite book is the Koran.
* Performed in "Con-Air-the Musical"
* Drinks Choco-tini's
* Being shunned from the "Vagina Monolagues" Her Vagina is like a convieniance store: clean,
reliable and closed on Christmas"
* Won a Cable Ace Award for "Arli$$"
* Practices Kaballah

Be back soon with Season 2

Friday, June 25, 2010

..."And then there's Maude"

Oh, Bea!!! Fist raised to the heavens, you mock Me!
I saw some old bird in the hospital with a total shoulder-pad look, and in my head I was thinking Maude.I cannot get that theme song outta (new word folks) my head.
Nightmares with transvestite looking women in caftans are going to smother me.

Wednesday, June 09, 2010

Top Chef Masters...F blanckity blank K

Dam it! Marcus Samuelson won. He with his stories of being dragged out of...Man, I'm so mad.The guy lived in Sweden since he was 7, stop pushing the AfriKan dishes (Until this round). I absolutely loved, as did my mom, Susur Lee. What frigging talent.

This is why people, that I never refer tomyself as a chef.
Most people, who get out of jail and who can cut onions julienne call themselves a chef.

Not my world....sorry

Wednesday, June 02, 2010

CHRIST!!...I miss smoking

I'm sorry. But, I have given up so many things...I'm AA, I'm Jenny Craig. What has any enjoyment ever given me than,when,finding yourself scattered in someone's flat or hotel a butt.

Tuesday, June 01, 2010


We had very rainy day this Saturday.I watched "Dexter" Pt.III on video. Amazing, but..I keep having these voice overs (a la Dexter) in my head!!

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Strangers with Candy

I just met some girl I hung out with for like 3 years (during high school) on Facebook. She hung out with the dudes who abused me, and I know she giggled. I forgive her.
This is how I can feel like a prick.
She has battled Cancer for 4 plus years.
We have began to get close.
She has 3 kids and she married some cool guy in my neighborhood.
I never want to wait anymore.


Those women from NY (housewives),whom I have to watch w/ my mom are in St.John. My dear God,I miss this place...


It's so apprpriate that the song "Ride" (Cary Brothers)is playing as I write this.
1992 I discovered this guy visiting from Sweden. I wanted this to be my gig. He was (not being faggy),the most gorgeous guy in the world. He was leaving for Sweden the next morning. He called me twice from Sweeden. Gosh....


This is how I go on Facebook. I login, I post a song, look at stuff and I am like a robber. I am out of there. I never want to see more than I can, and because I seem to extrapolate too much, I TRY and bolt.
Some guy from my old block that I grew upon found me. Accept.
A miasma of circumstances happened. #1: I have never said my real High School date (I put it at 1968)...
Too many people kept asking me about my marrital status...
For the first couple I said I was divorced,and then I broke down and decided, I hate frigging lying. So,I wrote my correct graduating year (1981)and said I was single. Fuck em!!!!
I have been getting hits, from graduates of my school, (ignore) but this one girl hit me up. Coleen, and she is like remember how you got me that job @ the Movie Theater (I was asst.mgr!!!!!!)...So,it turns out she married some guy I knew (a very cool guy) and she has battled Cancer and shit since then, and oh, she has a twin (whom I knew), and she's a dike. I felt like I was home...I toldthis old friend of mine about the asshole guys (They thought they were taggers...they called themselves T.S.O. the Serious Ones). They were assholes. I told her how this is a re-acurring instance in therapy and she could not believe it. These dicks tried to drown me when they saw me with the hottest girl in H.S. They embarrassed me so much,I wanted to die. (this is high school)
Anyway, Coleen just wanted to tellme that she thought I was ...
It made me feel good.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

I Need to Cry...seriously...get the hell away

Sarah Palin's daughter...the one who gave birth out of wedlockis now touring the country and giving speeches for 30,000.There is an express train with my name on it.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Can I get a Lawyer?

See, I have been finding these sights where I can download any song ever. And I kinda feel guilty, but my guilt is assuaged by the fact that I baught all these albums before. Like, I paid 10.49 @ Korvette's or Grants, and I kept these bitches with me all my life, and then, either it be lack of payment (Los Angeles) or Natural Disaster (Hurricane Andrew-storage-no insurance) I have PERTAINED these. So, Jacoby and Myers,can I get a break for downloading all these songs for free?

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

How fucked things are...

When i was writing that last post I was in the middle of downloading "Mother"by PinkFloyd. I can't wait to listen to it and cry my eye's out.

Mom's sick

My mom is sick. Lady problems. But like,older lady stuff. Don't even ask me what this means. We went to the hospital. She had an MRI. I was so frigging scared,but she told me that night that she felt good, because I was there. Some littlebrooklyn hottie asked me for my phone number. Surreal! Today,Monday. Mom got the results back. Maybe it was a botched hysterectomy in the 70's. I thank you Lord for giving me a fewmore years/months with her,so I can repair everything. I am not a pinhead (speaking of Kerry). Thanks God, even though I abhoar the Catholic Church, I still believe. Love always,Mickey

"Away we Go"

Let's say it is horrible outside,and you need to cuddle up and watch a good movie, this is the one. "Away we Go" with John Krasinski (from the Office)and a resplendent Maya Rudolph. Man,I really loved this film. Give me your replies if you saw it.

Dreams, thoughts and other mis-givings

I feel like Dorothy sometimes. I never remember my dreams, but through the day I want to say to you and you and you,that you all where there. I just know you were there. Jay and Mark, Char and Chrisstine,Slim and Donna,Jen and Marilyn, Scott and Jim P. Even those fuckheads who abused me.

Thank you Internet

So,I was hearing about this show on Starx. Seriously,who The F--- has starx? It's called "party Down" and I wrote about it like a month ago. Anyway, I did like a less than minute search and i HAVE WATCHED EVERY EPISODE on line,straight from japan! It's awesome...Domo Arigato!! I have also watched every episode of "True Blood" and "The United States of Tara"...Eat it Blockbuster!!

Within your Reach

I love The Replacements and they made a song...About death. And as much as I love these guys, they could not replace the loss I felt. This was one of the most trumatic times in my life.
I played "Within your reach" non stop. Then I moved home.
I just want to say,stupidlly,to Kerry,that I kind of loved her,as much as my heart alllows to love. I so wanted to take you on that weekend with me, but you had to watch your nephew. I love you Kerry. I ache for you,I scream some times about your death. Love always...Michael


Dear Courtney,
I hope you and your daughter reconcile but this is a horrible place to do it. I have a lotof faith in you C.L. I think you are so enanmored by technology that you are overwhelmed. Your loved, you stupidwrite-a-holic. I keep thinking of the great tunes you made.

Friday, May 07, 2010

This girls spirit...

This morning I read this story about some girl from Jersey who had been eaten by a crocodille while snorkeling off the coast of India. Her sister died 4 years go rock climbing. I ache for her parents, and I just wish they could know that their daughter permeated all of my thoughts yesterday.
Poor bubby.

Thursday, May 06, 2010

Extreme Happiness

Where does it come from? It comes from working class slobs such as myself getting their 2 seconds of recognition.
I KNOW this gig at the Food Network won't be for me. I can not pander and comeoutall Guy Smiley.

Wednesday, May 05, 2010

New Pills,Old Pills,Blue Pills,Pink Pills...

One works onw way (feeling good) but has the side effect of "Costanza out of the pool". Next one sort of works but my appetite is ravenous all the time (this is a no no). Next one is good,feel instant calming, but the Catch-22 is that Medicaid does not pay for it.So,I have to fly solo a little bit more. Bummer. Yeah, bummer.

"Lost" Make it Stop!!

Please. Let this show finally be over so some of the peope I usually read for interesting stuff can stop auto-erotic asphixiating themselves and trying to guess how it is supposed to end. Holy crap!

Saturday, May 01, 2010

Rocket is

This is one great movie..."Rocket Science"...Also,"Sunshine Cleaning" was a tremendous bomb,but it was poorly marketed,I thought it was pretty decent as well.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Alexi Murdoch

He's Irish. He's not swmary.
Please listen to this guy.

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Smile though your heart is breaking hired today.
I woke this morning from a dream which swept away from me as soon as my crusted eyes opened. River Styx, an arm, children, fear permeated.
I was awake 4 or five minutes when then palm of my left hand was itching like a gambler with a trifecta.It was then I realized this Italian (I think) wive's tale about an itchy left palm and good fortune. I sludged through the same ass procedures of the last 150 days, same outfit ( brought me luck once),and proceded toget talked down to by some twit...regardless (there is no room for negativity inmy life),I take the SI RR to the Ferry to NYC and transfer,and when I am 38 of 78 on line fore a waitering spot this guy calls. (718) number....hmmm...I answer. "Hello" "Can I speak to Michael?""Yeah this is him", "Hey this is Justin from blah blah...would youlike to work for us"

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Later Catholisism

I kind of stepped aside 5 years ago, but now I am gone. I still love you God, but I need a new adjunct.
Much love, Michael

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

The Runaways

In like 1974 I was watching this movie on channel 7. It was called "Dawn...Portrait of a Teenage Prostitute."
It starred a then post Brady Bunch Jan,aka Eve Plum(b)?. For me,the movie was riveting,because I have always,always wanted to run away from the scene I was in. And even then,I knew that Hollywood held something more,and yet something more dangerous than I was leading, but I was so attracted to that life so much more than this life.
Dawn, aka Jan Brady,is a ho on the rough and tumble streets of Holywood. But,as much as I was riveted to to Dawn and Alexander (Leigh J. McClosky), her male hustler friend, I was more riveted to the song that exited each scene.
If you know the song "Cherry Bomb" you know the beginning. Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun...Can't stay at home..."
These teasers where prevelent all through this movie, and when the song finally clicked in,and played, I was transformed.
I watched the credits,and people, if you watch CSI these days and hear a good song, they don't give credit.
But the God's were with me that night.
I sat about 2 inches from the big RCA..."Your gonna ruin your eyes".
And there it said.
"Cherry Bomb" by the Runaways.
The next day I made my way out to Korvette's and baught "The Runaways"

This is...Fresh Air

Man...I love Terry Gross. I picture her as this wormy, bespeckled , librarian type woman.She is the most intriguing woman, most introspective. I'm gonna make a shirt in the next month...I hope some of you will buy it (no profit on my end). Just fun.

The ROVE Boat

I saw the greatest job on line. They were looking for an Italian/American chef for a Chinese Cruise Line.

Fringers crossed

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Meredith Viera is an IDIOT!!!

During Monday morning's Today show Oscar coverage Meredith Vieira pointed out the hugs between Hurt Locker co-stars Anthony Mackie and Jeremy Renner from the time the film was nominated to Oscar night, and asked if it was something she needed to be

VIEIRA: "You hugged him pretty tight, I must say, in the moment. There was a lot of man lovin' goin' on last night. Do I have reason to be worried?"

MACKIE: Not from me. No reason.

VIEIRA: "Okay, you're fine? Yeah?"

Al Roker expresses astonishment at the line of questioning.

Lego of MY New York

German artist Jan Vormann and a small army of volunteers spent the past two weeks filling cracks in New York City buildings with Lego bricks.

Vormann arrived in New York two weeks ago "to support Mayor Bloomberg in his everyday-struggle to make this city even more amazing," the artist said on his project Web site. This is not the first time Vormann has used Legos in this way, but the New York project appears to have involved an unprecedented number of locations.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Tina Louise and me

There is no way how things happen sometimes. In like 1990,I was a waiter at The Russian Tea Room. Good gig.
We (my maitre d did) get the list of celebs/important (or impotent) people that day. Normal..normal...normal, and then I see her at the podium. My love, my scrap book making woman. La Louise. Ona,the maitre d, had no where to sit her but in the middle of the Russian Tea Room and the tables we called Siberia. I did not have the pleasure of waiting on her. I braved myself, and when her campanion went tothe rest room, I moved in like an unwanted 2nd cousin. "You know" I stated while clearing the borsht remains, "God's little Acre" was a great film. Hook,Line and sinker. She was blotting her lipstick on a tissue I quickly buried in my pocket when discarded. I hovered so uncomfortably, I started reciting her Imdb bio a decade beforeit's inception.She invited me to her daughter's 21 party or some such thing (her graduation from NYU) I can not recall,but it was at the club, MK. I wore leather pants that night (it was June) I was dying. She wore this gorgeous leopard wrap dress (cheetah? Cougar), I had a drink, and I left while this little surfer punk was hitting her up.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

One asshole

Man....You turned into the biggest asshole. I absolutely despise you. Billy Joel looks better.
I saw U2 at Cornell in like 82-83. it was roucous (sp). Sublime. I saw you again in 86...still small. I moved away and when i came back you were HUGE. Now,you (as the papers say) wear your oblig.glasses and you fake helping everyone yet dodging taxes. You sanctimonious piece of shit


Ya see. These people I was hanging around with were,I'm not saying beneath me, but they were not me. This charactor Steve, that i absolutly loved for bringing my face from a frown,up side down, I love. And then you get out of these closed quarters and you see how these people are. He treated everyone like they were his nurse.He littered profuselly, without err. He talked so loud on the phone on the train you would just slide further down the train so as not to know him.
This dickbag said something about me.

Sunday, February 07, 2010

Part 88

This guy Steve was the biggest dick. I started being in public. I swear, he like threw his bagel wrapper on thr floor of the train. Besides that, he talked on the phone and he was this loud bitch. He is trying 'save me'
This guy is so fucking stupid to realizehe is a caricature. Albanian or Yugo as he is.What a fucking dick. I absolutely hate this guy. Maybe heis pissedoff because, he felt , "felt" I was gay. And I made zero passes on this dick face.You should haveheard the stories both him and Castellano told. Fucking bullshit.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Ah Man...

I'm onna say it. I am one for three finding people. I soo wanted to find Miss Char S. easy as pie man. I put that unique name in a search engine and Blip! Gorgreous as ever. Now, i'm tring to find this guy. The thing is ,he has a very basic name "John Brown. Ask me again and I'll knock you down" It sucks. I kind of will never feelcompleter if i do not find this guy: Danny Edwards UMass Virgin Isles great friend Lalapalooza in Fla (I got run over by a Mister Softee truck). I miss and love this guy (not sexually, you pervs).

Christina Hendricks

What a goddess. Women,do you agree? I guess I've always had a thing for red heads, going back to Kerry O'Gara in my neighborhood and than Tina Louise. She's like a Victoria Principal, without the surgeon husband. I love Mad Men, and I love her. BTW...I first noticed her on "Life" a great fucking show on NBC which got cancelled due to a large chin.