Tuesday, October 03, 2006

I'm a Danish, I'm a Danish...Fuck me I'm a Danish

Like any dis-repecting homo; I almost got married. Twice!! The first was when Lisa, my Catholic respecting girlfriend missed her period the week after we had sex for the first time. She 'carried' for about 4 weeks before she mis-carried. In those 4 weeks, I already had us on a plane and me working double shifts to make it work (thanks Tim Gunn). We broke up before the yearbook came out and she dedicated her whole half page to me. Sneaky me, on the other hand decided to work for the yearbook that year and got to pull out all the sappy 'Little River Band' references.
Tora was next. Wow, she was a handful. She moaned and groaned when I would hold her hand. I was like, this can't be true. No human could be this into someone. Tora was from Denmark and I thought she only wanted a greencard.Alas, i was wrong.
I saw mis-carriage girl on the ferry about 12 years ago and she is fine, without me.
I looked up Tora on google Denmark and found her, unbelievably. She is fine. Without me.
As my friend Joyce says: Don't flatter yourself.

1 comment:

Urelle said...

I looked up one of my favorite ex-boyfriends and he is now gay and we talked a little and went over our breakup and its just kinda weird. At least your ex's still like men, he he I guess so do mine.